RSS feed culture

Bandanna Fashion

( culture / humor )
Nobody bats an eye now when I walk into a bank or store with a bandanna wrapped across my face. Of course, the gun is still a sure giveaway. ... read more

Kentucky Derby Postponed

( culture / sports / horseracing )
This is a first, as far as we know. No, we didn't research it. We don't do a lot of research here. :) Anyway... The 146th Kentucky Derby will be rescheduled from May 2, 2020 to September 5, 2020. See kentuckyderby.com ... read more

All Quotes

( culture / quotes )
When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad; and that is my religion. -- Abraham Lincoln We now live in a nation where doctors destroy health, lawyers destroy justice, universities destroy knowledge, governments destroy freedom, the press destroys information, religion destroys morals, and our ... read more

The Lazy Pug Cafe

( culture / writing / stories )
My latest short story, based on our real life pugs Daisy, Chandler and Joey, the latter of whom is the only one still alive and barking. See https://www.amazon.com/dp/B085XM6QW8 ... read more

The UN Looks To Protect Chimpanzee Culture

( education / news / rss )
Jordan Davidson - The United Nations famously protects cultural heritage sites, but for the first time it has recognized the unique culture of anim ... read more

Music By A Nephew (and Friends)

( culture / music )
on Facebook on YouTube on BandMix on ReverbNation ... read more

Placing The Ball Sarcastically

( culture / sports / soccer )
OK, this has got to be the most hilarious excuse for a penalty. See placing the ball sarcastically ... read more

10 TV Series With Conscious Themes -- If You're Looking For Something Good

( culture / movies-tv )
via collective-evolution.com "As the Founding Director of the Tribeca Film Festival, former Head of Content for GAIAMTV (Gaia), and now Founder and CEO of Conscious ... read more

Best Fiction Of 2019 (GoodReads)

( culture / writing / books / novels )
via Best Fiction Books 2019 " ... read more

Music By A Brother

( culture / music )
Music by one of my brothers: 'Til the Morning Comes ... read more

Review My Books

( culture / writing / books / novels )
If you've read any of my novels, below, please give them a review on Amazon. Thanks! ... read more

Good Article About Storytelling

( culture / writing / stories )
via the-good-guy-bad-guy-myth "Pop culture today is obsessed with the battle between good and evil. Traditional folktales never were. What changed?" ... read more

NFL Conference Championship Games

( culture / sports )
For the first time ever, I actually like all four of the teams left on the road to the Super Bowl: Titans v. Chiefs - Sunday at 3:05 PM EST; and, Packers v. 49ers - Sunday at 6:40 PM EST. The Titans are my current team (since I live near Nashville); I have always liked the Chiefs and Packers, for some reason; and the 49ers used to be my team when ... read more

No Annoying Prompts

( culture / technology / computers / internet )
Aren't you glad we don't have any of those annoying pop-up ads asking you to join our newsletter? Ironic, isn't it, given that we are an online newsletter? ... read more

Best And Worst Self-Publishing Sites

( culture / writing / advice )
Good site showing who to trust (or not) when it comes to self-publishing: self-publishing-service-reviews ... read more

Latest Deep Thought

( culture / quotes )
One way or another in our own inimitable way, we all do to others what was done to us. -- William Arthur Holmes Wow, that was deep -- William's internal critic ... read more

USMNT Fan-preferred Roster

( culture / sports / soccer )
Who do you want playing right now for the US Men's national soccer team (assuming everyone's available) for a hypothetical must-win game? VOTE HERE I like this lineup, here. ... read more

Most Popular Site On The Internet

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
This is the 12,157,539th most popular website in the world, according to silktide.com! Wow! We have hit the big time. See image here: ... read more

How To Support This Website

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
...should you be so inclined: Buy one of my books at Amazon or SmashWords, or Buy me a (virtual) cup of coffee ... read more

Joke Images

( culture / humor / jokes )
All joke images on this site ... read more

My Writer's Platform

( culture / writing / books / novels )
WilliamArthurHolmes.com is my writer's platform, with a page showing where you can buy, preview and/or review all of my books. Or, just look below... ... read more

Get Into Farming

( culture / humor )
Some bad language, but funny. Get Into Farming ... read more

Another Day In Paradise, Day 2751

( culture / writing / blog / employment )
Sitting here looking at James (not his real name) to my right. My workday would be sooooo much better if I could ignore him, but, being in the cubicle across the aisle, I can't. For those new to this space, James is an idiot. Literally. Okay, idiot/savant might be more accurate. He is wicked smart when it comes to computer programming, but I'm pr ... read more

All Of My Books

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Memes About Memes

( culture / humor / internet )
A couple of good ones. one two ... read more

Another Way: Beyond The Status Quo

( culture / writing / books / novels )
Available on Smashwords, Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, ... read more

British Problems

( culture / humor )
Stumbled upon this and thought I'd share. Here's a sample... Look, buddy, I get it . You have a Ferrari and you "wanna go fast" like Ricky Bobby but maybe central fcking London isn't the place fo ... read more

Knots By Anna Nalick

( culture / music )
Wow, great vocals. My current favorite UPDATE: Here it is at ... read more

Derby This Saturday

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Here are my picks for Saturday's Kentucky Derby: WIN - Cutting Humor (because I have that); PLACE - Country House (because I want that); and SHOW - War of Will (because I'm going through that with our daughter). ... read more

Restroom Difficulty

( culture / humor / stories )
Don't you hate it when you're at work? The end. Wait, that's not the end. You're at work — on the bottom floor, because that's where the snack machine is — and you decide to use the restroom. The cleaning lady is in there, with her cart blocking the door. So, you take the stairs back to your floor, the sixth, because you haven't m ... read more

Mongolian Throat Singing

( culture / music )
This (Wolf Totem by The HU) is wild. Surprisingly catchy... and a little bit scary. My daughter says it sounds like it's from a horror ... read more

More Miscellaneous Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Screw in a light bulb Q: How many Star Trek crew members does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Six. Scotty to get on the intercom when the light goes out and say, I canna do it, Cap'n! I'm not a miracle worker!; Spock to tell Kirk he is proceeding illogically; McCoy to say Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not an electrician!; ... read more

Leaving Zazzle

( culture / crafts )
Here's my goodbye letter to Zazzle. Yes, it's awfully bitter and conspiracy theory-ish, but I was upset. :) "Your new policy sucks, big time. And when I tried to create something new before the deadline after which they start charging monthly fees, it was so freaking difficult to post it for sale, I gave up. I'm sure you di ... read more

Good Album

( culture / music )
Dido's latest (here) is pretty good, FYI, if you generally like her music. ... read more

DIY Arts And Crafts

( culture / crafts )
If you've ever felt the need to do it yourself when it came to one of your crafty/artsy ideas, you might try CafePress and make something exactly as you want it. Yes, we'll get a small commission. ... read more

The Rainbow Ends In Sacramento

( culture / sports )
The rainbow really does end in Sacramento! My nephew Milan has captured proof. :) This was taken at their minor league team, Sacramento Rivercats, stadium where Milan works. ... read more

Last Train Out (again)

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Temporary Insanity

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Dance

( culture / dance )
via Puttin' on the Ritz in MoscowHundreds of dancers joined together in Moscow on 26.02.2012 to perform together a great flashmob of... ... read more

Quotes

( culture / quotes / religion )
"When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad; and that is my religion. -- Abraham Lincoln" All quote-related posts ... read more

Crafts

( culture / crafts )
Jana's Palickovanie art ... read more

Movies-TV

( culture / movies-tv )
Good quasi-clay-mation video ... read more

Writing

( culture / writing )
Writers Need Followers Screenplay submitted New rules for writers Started a new ... read more

Recently-discovered Book Repository

( culture / writing / books )
Hathi Trust Digital Library: hathitrust.org ... read more

Couple Of Good Ones

( culture / humor / jokes )
OK, three good ones. and and, this just in, something to settle the argument... ... read more

Bumper Stickers Again

( culture / humor )
Just thought I'd mention my bumper stickers again. Might be good stocking stuffers! :) UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress ... read more

How To Move A Book Store

( culture / writing / books )
... read more

Kentucky Derby

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Kentucky Derbyvia http://kentuckyderby.com... read more ... read more

Taking The Stairs

( culture / humor )
Don't you hate it when you're taking the stairs, looking down because it's a struggle, you think you've reached your floor only to look up and see you've got two more to go? Working on the third floor is rough! ... read more

Worrying Works!

( culture / humor / jokes )
Worrying must work, because everything I worry about ends up not happening! ... read more

Novels/novellas

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

USB Turntable

( culture / music )
I'm buying one of these: USB turntable. I've been wanting to convert my old vinyl records to MP3 for quite a while now. I hope it work ... read more

Good Quasi-clay-mation Video

( culture / movies-tv )
Great first video from several years ago by my niece here: Y19zSl2q5iQ. Her current YouTube channel is here: channel/UC-JJa3iNrgqhyRN-an4afPg ... read more

Quote On Tolerance

( culture / quotes )
"Total tolerance is not a virtue, it is a total lack of principles." — Plainsman 2016 And here are a couple more... "Never trust a republican with your PUBLIC LAND. Never trust a democrat with your FIREARMS. -- Bernie Kuntz 2016 "To one who has faith, ... read more

Too Funny

( culture / humor / transportation )
This is too funny not to share. See German man's car found 20 years after he lost it in parking garage. "Almost every driver has been there — when parking in a large lot or garage, it ca ... read more

Trail Of Blood

( culture / humor )
Walking in from the parking lot into work this morning, on the sidewalk I saw what looked like a trail of blood. There was a big spot of it at the top of the sidewalk, and it dwindled as it continued downhill toward the front door. What the...? This building is out in the middle of formerly beautiful countryside. Maybe a coyote (or a pack) killed a ... read more

Culture

( culture )
we have none. we can't even capitalize the first letter in a sentence. But seriously, here are some things to do in various cities (a work in progress): Things to do in Nashville ... in Sacramento ... read more

Ordering A Sandwich

( culture / humor / food )
Man behind the counter: What kind of meat? Me: Tuna. Man: Ham? Me: If by "ham" you mean "tuna," then yes. ... read more

Lesson On Taxes

( culture / quotes )
The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream. — Bill Murray ... read more

Natalia Holmes Photography And Videos

( culture / photography )
Natalia Holmes travel photography and videography on YouTube, InstaGram and Pinterest. ... read more

Diary, 2017/07/29

( culture / writing / blog / animals )
I just went down the road to the quickie-mart and got coffee. It's something I do most every weekend morning since throwing away my home coffee maker to keep me from drinking too much of it. On the way there, I saw what I thought was a dead turtle in the road. I hate that. Poor things just can't move fast enough. Half way there, up ahead, a ... read more

Novellas And Novels

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Please Patronize Me

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
Check out my Patreon page. Patrons get free stuff! Well, not technically free since you do have to pay at least $1 to get anything. Still ... "It would be amazing if I had any fans at all to help finance what I do! Thank you for (possibly) being one.&qu ... read more

Indian Flick With Subtitles

( culture / movies-tv )
So, I'm selecting a movie to watch on Netflix. I see "Holiday A Soldier Is Never Off Duty". It's Indian, with subtitles, but it's in the category of Action/Adventure. The blurb says "Capt. Bakshi sets out to stop a network of terrorist sleeper cells!" So, I give it a shot. Not crazy about subtitles, but I like foreign locales so ... read more

Folding Clothes

( culture / sports )
I thought I'd watch some sports while folding clothes (making up for my complete lack of doing chores yesterday). My choices were NBA basketball (where travelling is only called after 6 or 7 steps), bull riding (where I just feel sorry for the bulls), or a dog show (where I just couldn't care less). My sister Lucy would be in TV heaven, but I had t ... read more

Wife's Jetta

( culture / humor / transportation )
Driving wife's Jetta while my car gets serviced. I called it a piece of $h! while I tried to climb out. Its door hit me in the forehead during the struggle. So, I guess we're even. ... read more

If A Man Speaks In The Forest...

( culture / humor / jokes )
Joke we heard Lee Child telling (though we're fairly sure he's not the author)... "If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear it, is he still wrong?" ... read more

Putting Words In Mark Twain's Mouth

( culture / quotes )
Nice list: Putting Words in Mark Twain's Mouth I wonder if any of these are on that list ... read more

One Of The All-time Great Rock-era Lyricists

( culture / writing / poetry )
Listening to Don Henley this morning. He is one of the all-time great lyricists/poets. Just thought I'd say so. Then ... read more

Action Films On Netflix

( culture / movies-tv )
Almost half of all action films on Netflix have a variation of this description: "He thought he was retired, but has to do one last job! ... read more

My English Premier League Team

( culture / sports / soccer )
Trying to decide which English Premier League team I should consider "my team." Very important. Leaning toward either Liverpool FC (because I always liked the Beatles) or Plymouth Argyle Football Club (because my first car was a Plymouth, and I always l ... read more

Writers Need Followers?

( culture / writing )
Publishers and writing "gurus" preach that writers need followers. The problem is that emotionally-stable people don't want followers, they want friends, compatriots, people who listen, not followers. Especially zombie followers. They're the worst! :) ... read more

Out Of Toothpaste

( culture / humor )
Me (joking, the other day): I'm out of toothpaste! Whaddaya gonna do about it? Wife (without missing a beat): Find a husband with toothpaste, I guess. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I married her. :) And that's why I'm at the store right now, buying toothpaste. ... read more

Fence Guy

( culture / writing / blog )
So, the wife texts me saying, "Fence guy quoted $35500 to do the fence. He's coming out Wednesday." This is a fence repair for a small backyard, not a new thousand acre fence. Me: "How much?!" Wife (paraphrasing): "Oops, I left out the decimal point! ... read more

Decent Series Available Online

( culture / movies-tv )
Is there a single, decent series available online that isn't depraved; you know, doesn't involve zombies or some sort of depressing, apocalyptic, loser view of the world? Just wondering. Thanks.UPDATE: ... and four years later, we have an answer! See ... read more

Christmas Music

( culture / writing / blog )
With wife playing Christmas music this morning (as soon as is socially acceptable), it put me in the mood for this: Christian melodic death metal. Something for ... read more

Awkward

( culture / humor )
So, I'm walking back from feeding the neighbor's dog while they're on vacation. I see my wife and daughter in the car up ahead, just about to turn onto our street. I'm looking at them. They're looking at me (or at least it feels like it). They're still about a hundred yards away, so I'm not entirely sure. To be silly, I pretend to try and hide behi ... read more

Last Train Out

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

No More Penalty Shootouts!

( culture / sports / soccer )
I'm a huge soccer fan, but absolutely hate penalty shootouts. That is no way to decide a game. The winning team needs to be determined by playing the game, not through penalty kicks. That's like deciding an American football game by having five or six players from each team line up and kick field goals at the end of the game, or decid ... read more

Cereal

( culture / humor )
I think I'm addicted to cereal, I said. Addicted? she asked. Yeah, I'm gonna hit the street looking for my latest fix. And by 'street,' you mean Aisle 3 at Kroger, right? Don't question my street cred! ... read more

American Pharoah Vs. Secretariat, Who Would Win?

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Interesting! The 2015 Triple Crown winner American Pharoah ran the sixth-fastest Belmont Stakes ever, but if he was racing against Secretariat's record time in 1973, he would have been a distant second. Watch the two races side-by-side. Source: ... read more

All-time Favorite Songs

( culture / music )
Or, what I'd want on my MP3 player if stuck on a deserted island (with rechargeable batteries and a ... read more

The Road To The Kentucky Derby (2015)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
The 20 three-year-olds to make the starting gate in the Kentucky Derby are determined by the Road to the Kentucky Derby, a series of races leading up to the Derby where contenders can earn points. Follow the leaderboard to see who ... read more

My Novels

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

You Saying I'm Ugly?

( culture / writing / blog )
I was explaining to my 9 year old daughter what networking is, and that I'm not very good at it. She said, That's because a lot of people judge you by your looks. And you're not ... You trying to say I'm ugly? I don't think so, she said, but other people do, yeah. Don't you just love kids? ... read more

Cigar, American Racehorse, Dies At Age Of 24

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Sad news. He was one of the greats. We saw him in retirement at Kentucky Horse Park several years ago. via Cigar, American racehorse, dies at age of 24. ... read more

Forrest Gump Quote

( culture / movies-tv / quotes )
Just because it made me laugh out loud ... Jenny: Do you ever dream, Forrest, about who you're gonna be? Forrest: Who I'm gonna be? Jenny: Yeah. Forrest: Aren't I going to be me? via F ... read more

Photography

( culture / photography )
Wallpapers collected over the years. If you are the photographer/owner and want your photo removed, just let us know. Dreamstime ... read more

Parents Code Of Ethics

( culture / sports )
Signing my daughter up for softball, I just had to laugh at this (stripped down) Parents Code of Ethics: I will encourage good sportsmanship I will place the emotional and physical well-being of my child ahead of my personal desire to win. I will remember that the game is for the youth — not adults. I guess the ... read more

World Cup 2014

( culture / sports / soccer )
I love World Cup soccer (football/futbol to most of the world), so life is good now with all the games on. I'm ticked at ABC/ESPN for limiting all USA games to ESPN, which I can't see because we don't subscribe to cable TV. Of course, they do that to force people like me to subscribe, which I won't ... read more

Devastating Earthquake Rocks Southland

( culture / writing / stories )
from 1993 © copyright 1993 A powerful earthquake measuring 8.3 on the Richter Scale brought Southern California to its knees just before dawn yesterday. Hundreds of buildings in the greater Los Angeles area were completely destroyed, dozens more rendered uninhabitable. L.A.'s newly-completed MetroRail subway system collapsed in on it ... read more

Aliens Spoke To Me

( culture / writing / stories )
from 1993 I just started driving. I don't know why. Boredom, I guess. I left my house around noon. I'd had enough of watching football on t.v. and just felt like getting out. When I hopped into my truck I had no idea where I might go. East, I thought. To the desert, maybe. See the desert, I said to myself. To the desert I w ... read more

Remmy Gets Gas

( culture / writing / stories )
from July 1990 by Bill Remmy pulled into the gas station and jumped out of his pickup. He went to the rear of the truck, checked his reflection in the camper shell window, smiled, and slid the gas nozzle into the tank. He left the pump on automatic and wandered over to ... read more

So Much For Sacrificial Rites

( culture / writing / stories )
from February 1990 by Bill Holmes The High Priest announced, We must sacrifice a human life tonight. The crowd of Mibuku natives milling around the fire immediately tensed and fell silent. Suddenly, the High Priest pointed his holy finger at a lowly servant fanning the Queen. The servan ... read more

Baub

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990-2010 From September 5, 1989 In the vast expanse of Llycete Spaceport's docking yard on this below-freezing winter morning, the Mraclys, a small ship badly in need of a paint job, stood apart from the other ships. It stood out mostly because it was so ugly. Green on top, orange ... read more

California Chrome A Horse Of A Uniting Color

( culture / sports / horseracing )
They have a 77-year-old trainer who thought his big-time days were over, and a jockey who grew up afraid of horses.They pulled California Chrome's name out of Coburn's cowboy hat. If not for the luck of the draw the horse could have been named Seabisquick. ... read more

Best Thrillers Of All Time

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Advice For Writing

( culture / writing / advice )
A writer's narrative perspective (their voice, or, how they come across to their reader) must be: This is me talking to you.That's it. Nothing more, nothing less.It's not: This is me 100 years ago speaking in a classical voice.It's not: Speaking as if from professor to student or from adult to child.It's not: This is me thinking out ... read more

Hollywood Park, What A Run It Had!

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Today (December 22, 2013) is the last day of racing at Hollywood Park before it's torn down. It's sad, but that part of town has been the 'hood for several decades now, so it's no surprise no one wanted to go there.I worked there once, briefly, with the harness horses. It was back in the 80's, and it was not during a race meet, but just a plac ... read more

My Twitter Feed

( culture / writing / tweets )
Tweets by @TheBillHolmes And if the network you're on has Twitter blocked, but you're Jonesing for more of my witty banter, ... read more

Tweets

( culture / writing / tweets )
My Twitter feed: by @TheBillHolmes Some of my better ones, according to me ... Never work FOR someone else, work WITH them. I do some of my best work when I'm supposed to be doing something else. ... read more

Mucho Macho Man Grooves To His Song

( culture / music )
Breeder's Cup Classic winner Mucho Macho Man grooves to his song ... read more

This Is Deep

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
I just had to share this comment someone left here on FriendsNews.com. Read it, absorb it, digest it, lather, rinse and repeat it. Then let me know what the %$# it means! Here it is: "I comprehend that is genuinely uninteresting and you're merely skipping to the next comment, nonetheless i basically preferred to toss a s ... read more

Good Start

( culture / sports )
The NFL got off to a good start today, the first real games of the season.Both of my teams, the Tennessee Titans and San Francisco 49ers, won!The Titans were a surprise over the Steelers.The Niners won as expected even though they were playing the Packers.Normally, I'd be rooting for the Packers, but not against either of the above te ... read more

Movie Night

( culture / movies-tv )
My wife and I have been celebrating our twelfth wedding anniversary this weekend. The actual day was the 22nd (so mark your calendars for next year's gifts). :) With our daughter on a sleepover at a friend's house last night, Tara and I went to see the movie The Butler ... read more

Travers Stakes (2013)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Several big name horses in it this year: Verrazano, Haskell winner Palace Malice, Belmont and Jim Dandy winner Orb, Kentucky Derby winner Here are a couple of video analyses: ... read more

How Does Writing Affect Your Brain?

( culture / writing )
How Does Writing Affect Your Brain? infographic.Interesting ... to me, anyway. "Most of us write a little something everyday. It might be a grocery list, a poem, or a write-up on the infographic of the day. As we go th ... read more

Recent Tweets

( culture / writing / tweets )
I remember when I didn't know what a tweet was, other than the sound a bird makes. It wasn't so long ago, either. Below is just a random list of tweets. Pathetic, I know, but I felt the need to put something new on the site. Anyway... Saturday, July 20, 2013:   Picked more blackberries this evening, just before dark, before ... read more

Lost A Friend

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
No, not that kind of lost (knock on wood). So get that lump out of your throat. No, I just noticed I've lost a friend.Don't you hate it when you're walking along talking to someone, it's crowded, you hear a muffled scream but think nothing of it, only to realize several blocks down the street that your friend is no longer walking besi ... read more

Dinner And A Show

( culture / writing / blog / restaurants )
After stopping at Tara's sister Stephanie's house in Smyrna to pick up a newly-refurbished Kindle Fire that Todd had put ... read more

Alan Shore's Stick It! Speech

( culture / movies-tv )
Alan Shore's closing argument (from ... read more

Just Another Sunday

( culture / writing / blog )
Wife and kid are off at this thing called church. Maybe you've heard of it. I'm not familiar. Not sure what to make of it. :)I'm basically just hanging out waiting for the new mattress to be delivered. We told the delivery guy, Anytime! He sounded foreign. I hope he shows up before 10pm! Never know with these dang ferners! Anyway, we went ... read more

Started A New Story Today

( culture / writing / stories )
... read more

About My Books

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Father's Day

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
I'm just writing this post to get something new on the blog other than that free ad for Windows 7. :) We drove up to be with my wife's side of the family today for Father's Day. An extra special treat upon returning home was to discover that our 8-year-old, Elizabeth, had decided to trim her hair — to give herself bangs — on t ... read more

Guest Posting

( culture / writing / advice )
I've been following and listening to Jeff Goins's TribeWriters program, and he says an important aspect to successful blogging (at least as far as getting noticed) is to guest post on other people's blogs. Jeff is a great resource, by the way. So, if you want to post something on my blog, ... read more

Getting Used To Having No TV

( culture / movies-tv )
I'm slowly but surely getting used to having no TV in the house. It's been about a week now. I still get all the local news headlines by following those channels through Facebook. And the only thing I ever watched on Roku — with what little time our daughter allowed us ... read more

House Cleaning

( culture / writing / blog )
Doling out who would be doing what for today's house cleaning project, my wife Tara assigned the following to me: Strip and make the bed. Knowing me, she then felt the need to clarify this. That means strip the bed. I'll just let that sink in for those who don't immediately get it. During the chores, Tara told Elizabeth she could ta ... read more

No More TV

( culture / movies-tv )
We've turned off, unplugged and hidden the TVs from ourselves! The plan is to keep it that way throughout the summer. We'll see how long it lasts. :) Something tells me we'll be cheating by watching more stuff on our computers. Still, I expect us all to be just a little bit smarter because of it. :) ... read more

Food Matters Film

( culture / movies-tv )
Finally watched this Food Matters movie last night. It was great. MD's and pharmaceutical execs will hate it, of course. Anyway, I highly recommend it. ... read more

Holiday World

( culture / writing / blog / vacation )
I rode a rollercoaster for the first time in I don't know how long. It was a blast! The Raven has been voted most awesome or whatever wooden coaster several times in the past ten years. The Voyage, now the reigning champ of wooden coasters, was temporarily unavailable. Surprising ... read more

Not Pulled Over

( culture / writing / blog / dream )
Had a very brief, mundane, realistic dream the night before last in which I was pulled over by a traffic cop. I didn't think much about it until the next morning when I was going down Antioch Pike to a client's office. That particular stretch (as you pass the sports fields) is infamous as a speed trap. The speed limit is 35, but there's really no r ... read more

I Am Now A Published Author

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Derby Results (2013)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Florida Derby winner Orb won today's Kentucky Derby in the slop. But you've probably already heard/read about it. My pick, Revolutionary, finished 3rd. That was better than my picks have done in other years. It's a go ... read more

Kentucky Derby-related Pages (2013)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Where to keep up or catch up on the upcoming Derby: espn.go.com/horse-racing/triplecrown2013/ Kentuckyderby.com/horses hr ... read more

Great Suction!

( culture / writing / blog )
In preparation for the much-anticipated Comcast installation (Internet, not TV), I do as they suggest and clear out a space where I want them to put the cable wall jack. Once I have that space cleared, I decide to vacuum the area. It's almost an instinctive reaction: You clear out a space that ... read more

Doing The Dishes

( culture / writing / blog )
So, my wife tells me most people do the dishes every day. I don't believe her. Every day? I ask.Yes, every day, she says.Every single day? I persist. She nods. You don't mean, I search for clarification, it's something that is an 'every day' thing, but in reality is not done literally every single day, do you?No, she i ... read more

Tried To Mow The Lawn

( culture / writing / blog )
Well, I tried to mow the lawn, but the lawnmower wouldn't start. I swear. :) It's probably all clogged up from sitting there unused all winter. It was a hand-me-down mower, anyway, probably in need of replacing, but that's just not in the budget right now. Actually, the yard looks better au natural at the moment because it's ... read more

Road To The Triple Crown (2013)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
The Triple Crown 2013 - ESPN.I always try and follow these preludes to the Kentucky Derby so that I have at least an educated guess on Derby Day. ... read more

Kentucky Oaks & Derby (2013)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
2013 Kentucky Oaks & Derby  May 3 and 4, 2013  Tickets, Events, News.Time to start watching the Derby prep races so you can at least make an educated guess/bet on Derby Day! ... read more

So God Made A Dog

( culture / humor / pets )
I love this. via So God made a dog "And on the 9th day God looked down on his children and said they need a companion, so God Made A Dog. Paul Harvey-style tribute to dogs." ... read more

Chris Hedges Quote

( culture / quotes / politics )
"We now live in a nation where doctors destroy health, lawyers destroy justice, universities destroy knowledge, governments destroy freedom, the press destroys information, religion destroys morals, and our banks destroy the economy — Chris Hedges" Don't forget judges, CEOs and regulatory agencies! ... read more

Your Novel Blueprint

( culture / writing / advice / novels )
Good article for writers. via Your Novel Blueprint  WritersDigest.com "Writing a novel and building a house are pretty similar when you think about it. For instance, most builders or homeowners spend a lot of time dreaming ... ... read more

A Couple Of Books/novellas On Kindle

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

How Hubbard And Rand Got Their Ideas

( culture / humor )
According to this video, this must be how it happened. UPDATE: "How Ayn Rand and L. Ron Hubbard Came Up With Their Big Ideas" from ... read more

Quote Of The Day 2012/07/14

( culture / quotes )
"The War on Terror(TM) is a product. It doesn't exist 'to keep us safe'; on the contrary, it exists to keep us in a state of fear." — Liberty Underground News Service ... read more

Diary, 2012/07/02

( culture / writing / blog )
It almost rained today. I know, exciting. Apparently, it did rain pretty hard in some places, but not here on the south side. Hopefully, by this time next week it will have rained several times. The possibility is in the forecast, anyway. Just trying to keep my crops healthy. As Mark Twain said, Everybody ... read more

Diary, 2012/06/30

( culture / writing / blog )
It's supposed to be record heat again today. Yesterday was 109F degrees, which is unheard of in Nashville. Today is supposed to be 107F. I've already watered my fruit trees and vegetable garden in the backyard this morning. Yesterday when I came home from work, the garden was literally wilted from the heat. I have never had an entire garden wilt be ... read more

Quote Of The Day 2012/06/25

( culture / quotes / politics )
"To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize. — Voltaire" Good quote, but apparently not spoken by Voltaire.See answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid20 ... read more

Artwork

( culture / art )
Drawing ... read more

Bureaucracy At Its Worst, Legal Argument At Its Best

( culture / humor )
Part of rebuilding New Orleans caused residents often to be challenged with the task of tracing home titles back potentially hundreds of years.. With a community rich with history stretching back over two centuries, houses have been passed along through generations of family, sometimes making it quite difficult to establish ownership. A New Orl ... read more

Brisnet Top 10 Kentucky Derby Contenders (2011)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Brisnet Top 10 Kentucky Derby Contenders Here's the current year's: Kentuckyderby.com/horses/leaderboard ... read more

Great Commercial

( culture / movies-tv )
Commercial from Taiwan, for all you bikers out there, young and old:Dream Rangers ... read more

Aileen Holmes Showcases Her Work

( culture / art )
She's my niece.via Fashion and Art collide at The Promenade Gallery. ... read more

Kentucky Oaks & Derby (2011)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Time to start watching the races leading up to the Kentucky Derby so I have a clue who to bet on on Derby Day, May 7th.2011 Kentucky Oaks & Derby  May 6 and 7, 2011  Tickets, Events, News. ... read more

Events At Mpact Sports

( culture / sports )
For those in middle Tennessee: Events at Mpact. Elizabeth used to go here for gymnastics. They are a great bunch of people. ... read more

New Rules For Writers

( culture / writing / advice )
Anis Shivani: New Rules For Writers: Ignore Publicity, Shun Crowds, Refuse Recognition And More. ... read more

Fox 'shoots' Hunter In Belarus

( culture / sports )
Hooray for the fox! via Fox shoots hunter in Belarus "A wounded fox shot its would-be killer in Belarus by pulling the trigger on the hunter's gun as the pair scuffled after the man tried to finish ... read more

Couch Potato

( culture / writing / blog )
I've been a couch potato all day. Well, most of the day. I did finally pull up the dead crops in the vegetable garden at one point. And I did do some recycling, taking the paper, bottles, cans and plastic bags out of the trash cans and putting it into the appropriate recycle bins in the garage. I tried to accomplish a few things on the comp ... read more

Sold Another Bumper Sticker!

( culture / humor )
Man, that's three this year. At a dollar apiece, I'm gonna be rich! :) UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress (once it's set up). ... read more

Fastest Trooper

( culture / humor )
Montana State Trooper In most of the United States there is a policy of checking on any stalled vehicle on the highway when temperatures drip to single digits or below. About 3 a.m. one very cold morning, Montana State Trooper Allan Nixon responded to a call.There was a car off the shoulder of the road outside Great Falls, Montana.H ... read more

Greeting Cards By Natalia Holmes

( culture / art )
Greeting Cards by Natalia Holmes, my niece. NOTE: She no longer does this. ... read more

Television

( culture / movies-tv )
When I wasn't working on computers this weekend, I was trying to get the new used television working in the bedroom. Prior to even having a ... read more

New Washer

( culture / writing / blog / appliances )
The new washer was delivered today. I let them take the old one away even though we'd just bought it (used) a week ago. That's right, it lasted just one week. Oh well, we didn't really need that $200 (after tax and delivery), anyway. </sarcasm> I say let them take it because I could have had the repairman from the store, DT's Used Ap ... read more

Doormats With A Difference

( culture / humor )
... read more

Zenyatta Lost

( culture / sports / horseracing )
by half a head!This is the Breeder's Cup Classic I'm talking about.I thought she was hurt or something the way she ran dead last, 20 lengths behind.Then she came out of nowhere ... read more

Giants Win!

( culture / sports )
For the first time in my lifetime, the S.F. Giants have won the World Series!And they did on my birthday!Adding to my joy was seeing George W. Bush in the background, clearly unhappy. ... read more

All Time Best Movie Lines

( culture / movies-tv )
I thought it'd be fun to come up with a list of the all-time best movie lines. Use the comments section below comments closed for your suggestions. Try and do it from memory. Don't worry about getting it exactly right. Here's what comes to my mind: We'll always have Paris - Rick in Casablanca Louie, I think t ... read more

New Antenna

( culture / movies-tv )
Got the new tv antenna ... read more

Lucy's Birthday

( culture / writing / blog )
Today's my sister Lucy's birthday. She must be having a good one, because she has not replied to anyone's email birthday greeting. The previous weekend was our nephew Daniel's 2nd birthday party in Smyrna. That kid partied until it was almost dark! In other birthday news, we drove all the way to Smyrna again (15 miles away) to get a free birth ... read more

Diary, 2010/07/24

( culture / writing / blog )
We all went to the Nashville Zoo today. My God it was hot ... and sticky. Luckily, Blue Bell Ice Cream was handing out free cups of vanilla ice cream, which we grabbed upon arrival and at departure. I think today was literally the hott ... read more

Bumper Stickers

( culture / humor )
Make custom gifts at Zazzle UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend ... read more

My First Bumper Sticker Sale!

( culture / humor )
I just got an email saying I've made my first bumper sticker sale! They bought three, actually. At 33 cents commission per item, at this rate, one sale per year, I'll be rich in no time! UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress (once it's set up). ... read more

Quote Of The Day 2010/06/21

( culture / quotes / politics )
"Watching Titanic the part where the ship is sinking is like watching the U.S. economy, where the rich conspire to sink as many of the poor as they possibly can." — Bill Holmes (yes, I thought this one up myself!) ... read more

Installed The New Dishwasher

( culture / writing / blog / appliances )
I finally got around to installing the new dishwasher that Tara's sister Stephanie mysteriously bought for us. Not sure why, but I never look a gift horse in the mouth. Seriously, if anyone ever feels like giving me something, feel free! :) Anyway, taking apart the old one (and its hoses) released the most foul stench into the house. When Tara got ... read more

Quote Of The Day 2010/04/06

( culture / quotes )
"For life to work well for most people today, the universe has chosen an unlucky few for whom nothing works at all. :) Keep that in mind as you go through your day. — Bill Holmes" ... read more

McDonalds Wi-fi

( culture / writing / blog / internet )
In Nashville, anyway, it seems you can get around their proxy system (those outlets that use it), simply by using Google Chrome and maybe Firefox. It might be as simple as using any browser other than Internet Explorer. Using Internet Explorer, I tried to be a good boy and sign up for a free account. The only problem is that you h ... read more

Screenplay Submitted

( culture / writing )
I submitted a screenplay to Scriptapalooza today. See scriptapalooza.com. The first deadline is Friday the 5th. The real deadline is April 15. I think first prize is $10,000, but the main thing is that real Hollywood industry people read all of the scripts, so maybe even if you don't win the c ... read more

My Cousin Kenny's Book

( culture / writing / books / health )
... read more

Some Favorite Mark Twain Quotes

( culture / quotes )
It's easier to fool people than to convince them they have been fooled! The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures, but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot. If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the ne ... read more

Stories To Download

( culture / writing / books / novels )
... read more

Newly Discovered Radio Station

( culture / music / radio )
I just got my car back from the shop. $1500. Ouch! On the way home, though, I turned on the radio. All my preset stations were gone. Right. Whenever they reset the onboard computer, it resets my radio station presets. Kinda weird that it would, actually. Doesn't the radio have its own memory separate from the car's computer? Apparently not. ... read more

A Day Without My Car

( culture / writing / blog / transportation )
I'm just testing this Windows Live Writer software. UPDATE: There's now a newer, open-source version here. It was a dark and stormy night ... No, it was an unusually cold day ... yeah, that's it ... for the first week of De ... read more

Mr. Happy's 18th Annual Unusual Christmas Music Podcast

( culture / music / radio )
Seasons Greetings, You can tune in via your favorite mp3 player to the show: radio showWhat can you expect to hear? About 500 songs (over 24 hours of non-repeat music!) that fall into one or more of the following categories: musicians I like that happened to mak ... read more

A Few Bumper Stickers!

( culture / humor )
And one t-shirt, too. That's not me in the picture. :) Here's my store: zazzle.com/holmes3804 UPDATE: That was at Zazzle, but now I recommend CafePress (once it's set up). ... read more

Diary, 2009/10/28

( culture / writing / blog )
We had a Fall Festival party at Elizabeth's daycare/preschool tonight (called that because some parents don't like Halloween). Elizabeth went dressed up in her Minnie Mouse costume. She was very cute. But then, she's cute no matter how she's dressed. :) They had a magic show that was cute, but I've seen better. :) Actually, Elizabeth really enj ... read more

Diary, 2009/10/17

( culture / writing / blog )
Been trying to learn Cisco (network routing equipment) online through skillsoft.com, which I was given access to in my severance package. Maybe I need to just move out in order to get everything done that needs getting done. My 4 year old dau ... read more

Too Many Doctors Lately

( culture / writing / blog )
I had knee surgery the other day. They removed my bursa sac that kept filling up with fluid due to an injury. The only thing I can figure is that it happened when I helped this neighbor kid stop his bike as he was coming down the hill, scared and saying, Help! I jumped in front of him and stopped him, but he and the bike were heavier, with more m ... read more

Haircut

( culture / writing / blog )
Got a haircut today. Finally! What little I have left — after all the stress at work and the stress of the recent back pain — was getting pretty long and goofy-looking unless it was wet and slicked back. Anyway, I was sitting there in my chair getting my hair cut by the same middle aged woman who cut it last time. I had my head down as ... read more

Christmas 2008

( culture / writing / blog )
It took five months, but here it is: Christmas 2008 ... read more

New Fence

( culture / writing / blog )
I forgot to mention that I built a fence last weekend. It only spans about 12 feet from the side of the house to the retaining wall dividing us from our slightly-uphill neighbor. I've still got to cut a gate into it. Hopefully, I can pull that off. I pulled it off. See below. Then, maybe next weekend I'll get the other side of the house fenced. T ... read more

Thought For The Day

( culture / writing / blog )
I was noticing how I'm not as good of a speller as I used be, or at least not as quick. Old age, I figured. Brain deteriorating. Oh well. Then I decided it's not necessarily that big a deal when certain brain synapses or pathways/habits die or just get worn out. It just forces me to use other mental processes, other brain routes, sending me in ... read more

Diary, 2009/04/02

( culture / writing / blog )
Today is Dad's birthday. 90 years old! Amazing. I'm 48, in case you're wondering. Amazing ... ly disgusting! Oh well. Anyway, back to Dad. Longevity runs in his side of the family. His mother lived to be 101. His father made it to 81 or so, as did his oldest brother and only sister ... I think. I didn't really pay attention to their age w ... read more

Detroit Bank Robbery

( culture / humor / crime )
Detroit PD should be ashamed! :) See Detroit bank robberyUPDATE: That old link is dead. Here's the new link ... read more

Our First Outside Christmas Lights, Ever!

( culture / writing / blog )
That's it. No story. Here's the link: Our first outside Christmas lights ... read more

Diary, 2008/11/10

( culture / writing / blog )
Parents all worry about how well they're raising their kids; how they will behave; what kind of people they will grow up to be. Well, tonight I discovered a sad truth about our youngest daughter, Sunny. She likes to hang out in gutters. You heard me. Gutters! Oh, the shame of it all! Sunny is a cat, in case you didn't know. She was apparently h ... read more

Diary, 2008/11/07

( culture / writing / blog )
Well, I had a hell of a day. It started off normally enough, though it was raining, which is increasingly rare around here. I dropped Elizabeth off at school on my way to work, and from there my day took a wrong turn. I took side streets the rest of the way to work instead of the main Old Hickory Blvd route. The side streets are just faster, us ... read more

Old Music, Newly Uploaded

( culture / music )
Here's some piano music I've composed over the years, mostly from the late 80s and early 90s. I rarely play nowadays. None of the compositions (if you can call them that) had names until just now. And none of it is very professionally played or recorded, but it's all I could do! Still, all rights reserved by me. Feel free to download and play ... read more

Kokopelli Stitching

( culture / crafts )
Jana's Kokopelli stitching ... read more

Palickovanie

( culture / crafts )
Slovak art by Jana ... read more

Kentucky Derby (2008)

( culture / sports / horseracing )
Here's a list of possible starters for next week's Kentucky Derby: Derby 2008.The experts are divided between Big Brown, Colonel John and Pyro as their picks. You can see their picks on that page, above. You can also see all the horses' recent race results. Pyro was the o ... read more

Diary, 2008/04/26

( culture / writing / blog )
I took Joey to the vet this morning for a routine follow-up. I volunteered because I thought his appointment would conflict with Tara's plans to take Elizabeth to meet up with her Auntie, Tara's sister Sandy, at the Franklin Street Fair. Tara conveniently allowed me to think that. When Joey and I got back home, Tara and Elizabeth were both stil ... read more

Stage

( culture / stage )
The Thomas House ... read more

Radio

( culture / music / radio )
Online Radio stations Beat FM ... read more

Poetry

( culture / writing / poetry )
A Prince in Disguise ... read more

People You'll Be Missing And Why

( culture / writing / poetry )
by Jeannie Womack The time has come for you to move on, but I'm sure you'll be missing us while you are gone; No more conversation with boss Catherine to really make you think, You'll miss your adventures with super ... read more

Hats

( culture / writing / poetry )
by Jeannie Womack Joseph wore many hats in his life, the first one was of son, next an officer, a Dutch Marine, that to him was fun; In Maastricht, in '49, he married his childhood love, now he was T ... read more

A Prince In Disguise

( culture / writing / poetry )
by Jeannie Womack We met on the race track in '72 I couldn't resist his eyes, so blue We soon fell in love and started a life In '76 he made me his wife A teacher, leader, rebel and yes A son, brother ... read more

The Run

( culture / writing / poetry )
by Jeannie Womack Running in the rain isn't the pain a non-runner might think it would be I put on my jacket that has a hood, lace up my shoes, and stretching is good I open the door, expecting more ... read more

A Saga Of Seven

( culture / writing / poetry )
This is a story in the style called rap that'll surely encourage an afternoon nap of a family of seven, their kids and their wives and something regarding their travels and lives. Now first there was Greg, a Brooklyn-born lad; and then it was Lucy that Mom and Dad had. She was born at Sing Sing (no, not in the ... read more

Short Stories

( culture / writing / stories )
Really old (mostly bad) stories by Bill Lipstick & WD40 ... read more

Music

( culture / music )
Five apps that should make middlemen nervous BandCamp BandMix ... read more

Movies

( culture / movies-tv )
Free features! — A list of full-length feature ... read more

Fashion

( culture / fashion )
Aileen's store ... read more

Books

( culture / writing / books )
... read more

The Slow Leak

( culture / writing / stories )
copyright © Sept. 9, 2000 by Steve Holmes It was a gorgeous Sunday near the end of September and I needed some exercise. Exercise, just for the sake of exercise was probably best done by running on the treadmill at the athletic club. But on a day like that, just exercise wasn't enough. I would take a bike ride on the American River Bi ... read more

The Admired Car

( culture / writing / stories )
by Steve Holmes, © Copyright 2001 Beep, beep, blink, blink! How the car, George wished she could honk her horn and flash her lights. A car with a name? Yes, she knew her name was George because she heard one of her creators say it, By George, she's a beauty. It was a Sunday afternoon in the spring of 1925. Cars ... read more

Murder, Or Just An Honest Mistake?

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990-2010 The following story is rated PG. You figure it out. Madison Ripley Smith was sitting at his desk with his feet propped up when she walked in. Long legs, hourglass shape, luxurious jet-black hair, and matching jet-black eyes.What's with the black eyes, Smit ... read more

A Day At The Fair

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990-2010 I pulled into Angel's Camp around noon. I was supposed to be meeting my brother Don and his wife Diane there ... somewhere. We hadn't actually decided on a meeting place. That would have been too easy. I drove south on the main street through town (probably Main Street, ... read more

Lunch At Jack-In-The-Box

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1993 Driving around town the other day, I somehow ended up in Hollywood. I don't get to Hollywood much anymore and don't usually find myself missing it. But it was a beautiful day. And seeing all the quaint shops — each striving for uniqueness — and the many people on the st ... read more

The Leaky Weekly

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990-2010 The Leaky Weekly's motto used to be: It's Not Just A Newspaper, It's A Piece Of Us. This was quickly perverted by the locals into: It's not just a newspaper, it's a piece of ass. So the motto was changed to: It's Not Just A Newspaper, It's A Family Newsletter. And that's ... read more

One Of Those Nights

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990-2010 It was late. Claude couldn't sleep. He decided to walk to the corner liquor store for munchies and beer. As he entered the store, he noticed a girl at the phone-booth by the door. She smiled a curious smile and Claude smiled back uncertainly, then proceeded into the store. ... read more

Lipstick & WD-40

( culture / writing / stories )
by William Arthur Bill Holmes. © Copyright 1990 Sandi strolled out of the motel room wearing her tight spandex pants, high-heeled shoes and a simple peasant blouse. She had just turned another trick and she wanted to vomit. This was not a reaction to just the one trick, but from the life she had been leading these past several ... read more

Good Friday

( culture / writing / blog )
It WAS a good Friday. There was nothing religious about it. If you know me at all, that wouldn't surprise you. I was just reading my previous post and wanted to have something more positive this time. We're all still adjusting to each other and getting better at it every day. That last post was three weeks ago and feels like months ago. She alm ... read more

Sports

( culture / sports )
Soccer Bleacher Report - Soccer ESPNFC ... read more

April Fool's Day Hoaxes

( culture / humor )
April Fool's Day Hoaxes/Friday Funnies/April Days Top 10 April Fools hoaxes SPAGHETTI HARVEST - Bogus item on 1957 BBC news show Panorama. Viewers seeking advice on growing their own were told to put spaghetti sprig in tin of tomato sauce. SAN SERRIFFE - Guardian newspaper published seven-page supplement celebrating the Ind ... read more

Airline Cabin Announcements

( culture / humor )
All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in flight safety lecture and announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported: 1. On a Southwest flight 245 (SW has no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a fli ... read more

Bill And Tara's Excellent Adventure

( culture / movies-tv / restaurants / transportation )
It started out as an innocent attempt at "dinner and a movie" on a Saturday night. It turned into... Tara's nightmare! Okay, maybe it wasn't quite that bad, but still... We had dinner at Schlotzsky's, each of us ordering one of their 8" "personal" ... read more

Stupid Sayings

( culture / humor / jokes )
Save the whales. Collect the whole set. A day without sunshine is like, night. On the other hand, you have different fingers. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. 99 percent of politicians give the rest a bad name. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. HONK if you love p ... read more

Lawyer Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Courtroom Capers   Mary Louise Gilman, editor of the National Shorthand Reporter, has collected many hilarious courtroom bloopers in two books (Humor in the Court (1977) and More Humor in the Court). .newspaper -webkit-columns: 60px 3; -moz-columns: 60px 3; ... read more

Blonde Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
A blonde is driving home and she gets caught in a really bad hail storm.The hail is as big as tennis balls, and she ends up with her car covered with large dents. So the next day she takes her car to the repair shop. The shop owner, seeing she is blonde, decides to have a little fun. He tells her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe, really ... read more

Jokes

( culture / humor / jokes )
Images Joke-related posts, ... read more

A Day At The Races

( culture / sports / horseracing )
from 1994 The first Saturday in May. What does this date mean to you? Probably nothing, except that Spring has finally arrived, unless you live in California where it's been Spring already for two months or more — real Spring, not calendar Spring. But ask any horse racing buff and they will tell you without hesitat ... read more

A Girl Named Lucy

( culture / writing / poetry )
from 1990 This is a story 'bout a girl named Lucy Otherwise known as The Rappin' Watusi She lays down a beat that gets your toes tappin' If your toes get tired, let your fingers do the snappin' She says Hey buddy, don't you be no square If you can't find a partner, use a wooden chair Okay, so you've hear ... read more

Barbecue Season

( culture / humor / jokes )
After months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following cha ... read more

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